Weather was ordered from the penthouse of awesome this past week. This makes the thoughts of angrily looking out the window shaking my fist at clouds a distant memory.
Subconsciously if you have an animal in the name of your band there is more of a chance that I will enjoy your band.
Gambling on people playing video games is a thing. I had no idea until recently. Soon we could start gambling on who people will gamble on while they are gambling on somebody playing a video game.
I find these commercials that come out for video games amusing. We have Sly Stallone talking about how to be a winner and to get back up after getting knocked down in a video game. I know most video games you just have to hit two buttons simultaneously to get back up. Doesn't seem too difficult to me.
Sin City 2 - 7.0/10
It was exactly what I wanted it to be. Basically, same as the first one with different story lines. For the critics that wanted more. Where did you want them to go with it? Eva Green is getting into the zone with her roles lately. She might be the coolest woman in the world right now.
Sara and I did a walk for RARE yesterday. They raised an incredible $33,000. It's a foundation about getting children outside to play again. Stopping all the development in areas where nature is abundant. I think we would be much better off if we didn't build so many McMansion's. "Where am I going to put my two boats and four cars for the two of us that live here though?"
Books are pretty good weapons. I dropped a hard cover on my foot recently. It hurt more then I thought it would.
Person this week told me that she thought that Government had hacked into her toilet and wouldn't allow it to flush anymore. This is the time that we need a bat phone to the looney bin.
How the movies treat Looney Bins is kind of funny to me. "You aren't saying things that make any sense. We are going to put pajamas on you and have you play kids board games."
We all have that person in the family that ruins the night after they lose a game of Monopoly. You know who you are. You are either laughing or getting mad at this. "There goes Uncle Randy. Broken wine glass on the floor, pieces of the game scattered throughout the room. Aunt Ruth, well let's round up the kids." Way to go Uncle Randy. The jello is still left in the fridge.
We managed to beat one of the better coed teams last night. I find that if you are just overbearingly upbeat about your teams performance that it starts to anger the other team. This will throw them off of their game. Try it next time. This body break was brought to you by Hal and Joanne McLeod
When people are running by I still get that need to stick out my foot. I know instantly it would be a mistake and anger pretty much everyone that is around, but it's still an instinct that I have.
Put your hands up if you are watching Once Upon a Time? Now put your hands down. Now put your heads down in shame. That show is a piece of sh**.
Halloween is approaching. For those adults that don't like dressing up. Well, you are boring.
Top 3 worst costumes that I have seen.
3 - The Shocker, for those that know anything about sexual moves. You will know exactly what this is.
2 - White MC Hammer in black face
1 - Will just throw every scandalous super hero woman's $20.00 Party City costume here.
Monday, September 29, 2014
The season has finished up for most teams and should have for others. The first half of this blog will be about the Jays. Second half about the A's.
The Toronto Blue Jays exceeded every one of my expectations. I expected them to be a .500 team. Every player that was in that every day lineup either had better years then were expected or played just as expected. The only exception in my mind is Brett Lawrie. So where did they go wrong? Being up by a bunch of games going into July. When the pitching came back to earth and the injuries began to pile up. This team has just as much talent as the KC Royals and Seattle Mariners. They don't have the excuse of having the play the Red Sox and Yankees so often. They failed to adapt when things started to go wrong.
Unfortunately Mark Beurhle isn't going to have a 2.20 ERA at seasons end. Bautista and Melky aren't going to hit .340 with a .470 OBP. You need to have unexpected people to step up. Well you did have that. Navarro had 70 RBI's and Stroman became their clear cut ace. So where else can we lay the blame? AA not making a move at trade deadline? Well the three that would have made a difference would have been Jeff Samardzija, Jon Lester, or David Price. Any one of those trades would have cost you Stroman, Sanchez or maybe both. So the other options are John Lackey, Ian Kennedy, Bartolo Colon, or Justin Masterson. Are any of those pitchers better then what you already have in your starting 5? Let's look at the hitters that were available. Josh Willingham, Adam Dunn, and Chase Headley. Would any of those hitter make a difference? You don't hear winning teams complaining about the team not making a move. That's what the Jays love to do. The Pirates stood pat. They had confidence in what they had to get it done. The team that made the most moves almost cost themselves a playoff birth. When you complain about the team not making moves. You are only saying that you don't have the confidence that you can do it with the group that you have.
The future is bright in Toronto. We witnessed a peak into the future starting rotation. If they get back a healthy Lawrie and can resign Melky they will be just fine. You can always retool the bullpen. I thought they had a two year window with the trades that they made, but after seeing all the pitching talent coming up I think they will be fine. Behind the bench is their obvious weakness. AA unfortunately is hedging his bets with Gibbons. If the Jays get off to a slow start he can fire him. If he fires him in the off-season, and they get off to a slow start he might be on the chopping block. Hopefully AA will give a call to Ron Washington to gauge his interest. That's the only real move he needs to make. So I sit here confused. I look at the stats of this team and realize that they should have been right there in the wild card hunt. They did play some meaningful games into September. I guess that's a start. I just look at what Clint Hurdle, Buck Showalter, and Mike Matheny are able to do with similar talent and think that if the Jays just had a manager.
My beloved A's. What the hell happened? You can blame the Cespedes for Lester trade all that you want. It's not just that. This team was cruising. Everything was firing on all cylinders. It looked like another one of those years. The Angels overpay for a bunch of free agents and are a bust. The Rangers who might have the worst management in the league make some awful deals and have a bunch of injuries and can't compete. The Mariners are the Mariners, and then you have the Astros. Then all of a sudden the Angels become who I thought they would be three years ago. All of the Mariners pitching prospects blossom at once. Watch out for this team for the next few years. The A's are the prototypical idea of you don't mess with chemistry. When you have the best record in baseball do you trade your best prospect and cleanup hitter away for two aces that might put you over the hump? He took a chance and it looks like it backfired. Now they still made the playoffs, but if you have been watching any games recently....
If they do manage to get past the Royals in the Wild Card game they will have the Angels sitting there waiting for them. One thing that I do know about baseball winners in the past. Pitching rarely goes cold. The A's have the best 5 in the majors. If they can get just enough hitting they can do some damage. Lester has won big games before. That experience might be necessary. The A's have tried the past two years with identical lineups and couldn't get by the Tigers. So do you go at them again with exactly the same thing? I understood Beane's philosophy. He knew that Cespedes would get huge money after next year. He cleaned out the prospect closet with the Cubs trade. It's a tough call. If they blow it in the wild card game it will go down as two terrible trades. If they end up getting past the Royals and start to get hot? This team has put too many expectations on themselves. They play quite a bit better when they have that underdog identity. If you look at that lineup they are still a bunch of hitters off of the scrap heap of other major league teams with Josh Donaldson being the exception.
The American League is wide open this year. The Angels lost Garret Richards for the year and are really relying heavily on a 87 MPH Jared Weaver fastball. The Tigers have a great lineup, but their pitching even after the trades looks suspect past Scherzer and Price. Their bullpen is probably the worst of all the playoff teams. The Orioles? Their lineup is murderers row, but who are these guys that are pitching? Buck Showalter should win manager of the year. There is no clear cut favourite. It should be a fantastic playoff this year. It will be a couple of stressful days for me with the Pirates and A's both playing in the Wild Card games. It's been an exceptional year of baseball. One of the best that I can remember. Just a little off topic, but what were they putting into our drinks that we didn't realize they were taking steroids when they were putting up 70 HR's in a year?
The Toronto Blue Jays exceeded every one of my expectations. I expected them to be a .500 team. Every player that was in that every day lineup either had better years then were expected or played just as expected. The only exception in my mind is Brett Lawrie. So where did they go wrong? Being up by a bunch of games going into July. When the pitching came back to earth and the injuries began to pile up. This team has just as much talent as the KC Royals and Seattle Mariners. They don't have the excuse of having the play the Red Sox and Yankees so often. They failed to adapt when things started to go wrong.
Unfortunately Mark Beurhle isn't going to have a 2.20 ERA at seasons end. Bautista and Melky aren't going to hit .340 with a .470 OBP. You need to have unexpected people to step up. Well you did have that. Navarro had 70 RBI's and Stroman became their clear cut ace. So where else can we lay the blame? AA not making a move at trade deadline? Well the three that would have made a difference would have been Jeff Samardzija, Jon Lester, or David Price. Any one of those trades would have cost you Stroman, Sanchez or maybe both. So the other options are John Lackey, Ian Kennedy, Bartolo Colon, or Justin Masterson. Are any of those pitchers better then what you already have in your starting 5? Let's look at the hitters that were available. Josh Willingham, Adam Dunn, and Chase Headley. Would any of those hitter make a difference? You don't hear winning teams complaining about the team not making a move. That's what the Jays love to do. The Pirates stood pat. They had confidence in what they had to get it done. The team that made the most moves almost cost themselves a playoff birth. When you complain about the team not making moves. You are only saying that you don't have the confidence that you can do it with the group that you have.
The future is bright in Toronto. We witnessed a peak into the future starting rotation. If they get back a healthy Lawrie and can resign Melky they will be just fine. You can always retool the bullpen. I thought they had a two year window with the trades that they made, but after seeing all the pitching talent coming up I think they will be fine. Behind the bench is their obvious weakness. AA unfortunately is hedging his bets with Gibbons. If the Jays get off to a slow start he can fire him. If he fires him in the off-season, and they get off to a slow start he might be on the chopping block. Hopefully AA will give a call to Ron Washington to gauge his interest. That's the only real move he needs to make. So I sit here confused. I look at the stats of this team and realize that they should have been right there in the wild card hunt. They did play some meaningful games into September. I guess that's a start. I just look at what Clint Hurdle, Buck Showalter, and Mike Matheny are able to do with similar talent and think that if the Jays just had a manager.
My beloved A's. What the hell happened? You can blame the Cespedes for Lester trade all that you want. It's not just that. This team was cruising. Everything was firing on all cylinders. It looked like another one of those years. The Angels overpay for a bunch of free agents and are a bust. The Rangers who might have the worst management in the league make some awful deals and have a bunch of injuries and can't compete. The Mariners are the Mariners, and then you have the Astros. Then all of a sudden the Angels become who I thought they would be three years ago. All of the Mariners pitching prospects blossom at once. Watch out for this team for the next few years. The A's are the prototypical idea of you don't mess with chemistry. When you have the best record in baseball do you trade your best prospect and cleanup hitter away for two aces that might put you over the hump? He took a chance and it looks like it backfired. Now they still made the playoffs, but if you have been watching any games recently....
If they do manage to get past the Royals in the Wild Card game they will have the Angels sitting there waiting for them. One thing that I do know about baseball winners in the past. Pitching rarely goes cold. The A's have the best 5 in the majors. If they can get just enough hitting they can do some damage. Lester has won big games before. That experience might be necessary. The A's have tried the past two years with identical lineups and couldn't get by the Tigers. So do you go at them again with exactly the same thing? I understood Beane's philosophy. He knew that Cespedes would get huge money after next year. He cleaned out the prospect closet with the Cubs trade. It's a tough call. If they blow it in the wild card game it will go down as two terrible trades. If they end up getting past the Royals and start to get hot? This team has put too many expectations on themselves. They play quite a bit better when they have that underdog identity. If you look at that lineup they are still a bunch of hitters off of the scrap heap of other major league teams with Josh Donaldson being the exception.
The American League is wide open this year. The Angels lost Garret Richards for the year and are really relying heavily on a 87 MPH Jared Weaver fastball. The Tigers have a great lineup, but their pitching even after the trades looks suspect past Scherzer and Price. Their bullpen is probably the worst of all the playoff teams. The Orioles? Their lineup is murderers row, but who are these guys that are pitching? Buck Showalter should win manager of the year. There is no clear cut favourite. It should be a fantastic playoff this year. It will be a couple of stressful days for me with the Pirates and A's both playing in the Wild Card games. It's been an exceptional year of baseball. One of the best that I can remember. Just a little off topic, but what were they putting into our drinks that we didn't realize they were taking steroids when they were putting up 70 HR's in a year?
Monday, September 22, 2014
Started to play Dodgeball on Monday nights. You have these wonderful memories. Diving, ducking, and throwing the ball with such grace. The new reality is. Out of breath, hurting your arm, and pouring sweat from every possible area of your body is the new reality. It's still a great time, but it comes with old man consequences.
Just returned from a wonderful weekend. Wedding of two wonderful people. They had an absolute gorgeous scene of a winery on the lake. The most memorable part was when a strong gust of wind took all of the papers and blew them all over the property. The marriage certificate flew into a branch of a tree and was retrieved by a guest that received the prize of plants stuck all over him when he came back.
Sara and I had a cottage rented for the weekend as well. Making the most of the weekend, we also purchased the food and wine tasting pass. Duck Poutine, cranberry and stuffing crammed into turkey meatballs, and bison stew were the highlights. Kacaba once again shined with the Duck Poutine and multiple tastings of their award winning wines. If you haven't been there yet and enjoy wine, then well, you are a bad person.
Lucky Them - 8.3/10
The Signal - 6.8/10
Interpol is back with a new album. They have finally gotten back to the mood music that made them so amazing early in their careers. The tones and guitars are loud and in abundance here. Check it out. 8.1/10
There isn't anything more frustrating then pouring cereal into a bowl and having no milk. Sometimes I leave the cereal in the bowl. I get so mad at the cereal when this happens. "Where did the milk go you stupid bee?"
Angry drunks are unpredictable. With each drink they should have to have an Earl Grey Tea. Nobody is mad after drinking Earl Grey Tea.
Seeing somebody wearing the complete horse riding gear and riding a giant horse makes me want to avoid conversation with them. For some reason I think they are going to be either boring or racist, or maybe both. A boring racist is a terrible combination.
German medicines and Mexican Soda were being sold at a variety store in Virgil that was owned by an Asian man. What does German medicine even mean? Maybe if you are sick they just give you Black Forest Cake.
The most difficult part of my day yesterday was having to drive by Silversmith brewery without stopping. It felt like a scene in a movie when a grown man is driving by the ice cream stand that he had such great memories of as a child. Tears soaked his alcohol stained suit jacket as Phil Collins belts out Against all Odds.
Where do squirrels find all of these nuts? I have never seen one nut just lying on the ground. This would be an awful documentary, but I feel as though that it needs to be made.
Top 3 Things that happen at the Tim Horton's drive thru that anger people.
3 - Person in front of you had a giant order that is taking at least 6 minutes to come out.
2 - Throwing their empty coffee cup into the recycle bin. It hits the edge then somehow ends up on the ground. You must then unhook your seat belt and reach out of the car. Or you can be the douchebag that leaves his garbage on the ground. The person right behind you is judging you regardless.
1 - Frozen window
One thing that I have finally developed. The respect of my peers when I wear Converse shoes to weddings. I was graciously accepted. I thank you all for that.
Just returned from a wonderful weekend. Wedding of two wonderful people. They had an absolute gorgeous scene of a winery on the lake. The most memorable part was when a strong gust of wind took all of the papers and blew them all over the property. The marriage certificate flew into a branch of a tree and was retrieved by a guest that received the prize of plants stuck all over him when he came back.
Sara and I had a cottage rented for the weekend as well. Making the most of the weekend, we also purchased the food and wine tasting pass. Duck Poutine, cranberry and stuffing crammed into turkey meatballs, and bison stew were the highlights. Kacaba once again shined with the Duck Poutine and multiple tastings of their award winning wines. If you haven't been there yet and enjoy wine, then well, you are a bad person.
Lucky Them - 8.3/10
The Signal - 6.8/10
Interpol is back with a new album. They have finally gotten back to the mood music that made them so amazing early in their careers. The tones and guitars are loud and in abundance here. Check it out. 8.1/10
There isn't anything more frustrating then pouring cereal into a bowl and having no milk. Sometimes I leave the cereal in the bowl. I get so mad at the cereal when this happens. "Where did the milk go you stupid bee?"
Angry drunks are unpredictable. With each drink they should have to have an Earl Grey Tea. Nobody is mad after drinking Earl Grey Tea.
Seeing somebody wearing the complete horse riding gear and riding a giant horse makes me want to avoid conversation with them. For some reason I think they are going to be either boring or racist, or maybe both. A boring racist is a terrible combination.
German medicines and Mexican Soda were being sold at a variety store in Virgil that was owned by an Asian man. What does German medicine even mean? Maybe if you are sick they just give you Black Forest Cake.
The most difficult part of my day yesterday was having to drive by Silversmith brewery without stopping. It felt like a scene in a movie when a grown man is driving by the ice cream stand that he had such great memories of as a child. Tears soaked his alcohol stained suit jacket as Phil Collins belts out Against all Odds.
Where do squirrels find all of these nuts? I have never seen one nut just lying on the ground. This would be an awful documentary, but I feel as though that it needs to be made.
Top 3 Things that happen at the Tim Horton's drive thru that anger people.
3 - Person in front of you had a giant order that is taking at least 6 minutes to come out.
2 - Throwing their empty coffee cup into the recycle bin. It hits the edge then somehow ends up on the ground. You must then unhook your seat belt and reach out of the car. Or you can be the douchebag that leaves his garbage on the ground. The person right behind you is judging you regardless.
1 - Frozen window
One thing that I have finally developed. The respect of my peers when I wear Converse shoes to weddings. I was graciously accepted. I thank you all for that.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
In Men's slo-pitch we finished the regular season undefeated. 15-0, if you would like to come support your local Go Balls Deep team we will be showing off our skills at the Ice Park in Cambridge tomorrow night. We will be signing empties and cigarette packs after the game as well. There are a few of the guys that don't mind signing cleavage as well. Male or female, doesn't matter.
Edge of Tomorrow - 8.2/10
X-Men - Days of Future Past - 9.2/10
Two terrific movies. Really enjoyed watching Tom Cruise get killed over and over again. Some brilliantly shot scenes in the new X-Men. Marvel has got the comic book movies mastered. I just envision a room in a basement of a bunch of males and females debating episode 38 of the X-Men comic book. Bowls of cheesies, empty cans of red bull, and two action figures battling. Old school gaming console would be in there with the limited edition of Ninja Gaiden 16 bit styles.
There are many fine breweries in Southern Ontario. Walk into your local LCBO and just start grabbing random tall boys. I guarantee you will not be disappointed. Even just by the names of the cans. Hop City now has a beer called Robot IPA. Railway City has one called the "Witty" Traveller. Blah, blah, blah hipster. Try some different beers.
There was a time in my life that I only drank Budweiser. There was also a time that I only listened to Limp Bizkit and Korn. I have worn terrible clothing, had a mullet, and rocked rapist glasses. These are the burdens that I must carry.
Sara is home, her work bought her flowers and put up streamers in the office. You never realize how valuable Wayne Gretzky is to your team until you have traded him for Jimmy Carson.
Calgary has snow. I am not ready for this to happen. Winter is like that super old man down the cereal aisle that is taking up the whole aisle with his walker. You just want to grab the Honey Nut Cheerios, but he is directly in front of it. He has been looking at the ingredients of Shredded Wheat for at least three minutes. You have said excuse me, but he either didn't hear you or he is grumpy. Now you must wait it out.
What do you think teachers that teach marketing do? See what they did there? That sold really well. Copy that.
People that are massage therapists have it tough. I am sure that their significant other expects massages all the time. It's like somebody that is a chef. If you come home with McDonald's, your wife or husband will have that "What the Fu**" all over their face.
There should be a once in a lifetime opportunity to be put into a serious sporting situation. Like if you win a lottery of some sort. You could be put into the run a 4th and 1 with the game on the line. "Here comes Daryl Smith to run this short yardage play with Green Bays season on the line. The crowd is booing him. Why would they ever make a lottery like this? Oh, and he is stuffed. His leg looks broken."
The Oakland A's are falling apart. It's difficult to watch the team right now. Every situation they are in they look tentative. It's almost to the point of being uncomfortable. It's like every episode of the British Office.
Sometimes it's frustrating when people don't understand sports. Like they don't know how difficult it is to making a jump, spin, and throw to get somebody out. Yes, that's my specialty. I guess it's the same way when someone takes a really good photo and shows it to me. "Look at the colour definition and abstract look of this photo." "I like the last one with the cat in the box instead of it's bed."
Top 3 professions that I could not date that's not the obvious.
3 - Personal Trainer - Every time that I ate chips I would feel bad
2 - Psychiatrist - I don't want to lay down on the damn couch
1 - Sales person - Two sales people in one house. A lot of talk, without anything ever getting done.
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
When arriving in a limo to wineries and breweries you kind of feel like you need to be extremely nice so that people won't detest you for showing up in a limo.
Sara is back in less then a week. I have never lived alone for any amount of time. It's going to be very strange to have somebody in the house again. It should prevent me from talking to myself. One thing I noticed is that I am a genius when there is nobody to debate me on anything.
There are things that are in my house that I can't believe were purchased. None more stupid then buying fur from Fabricland without knowing how to sew. I just thought I would sit down at a sewing machine and it would come to me to know how to sew a Teen Wolf costume.
Put a cork screw through a screw top wine bottle last week. Not once, but twice.
The Double - 7.5/10 - Jesse Eisenberg has a doppleganger that is nothing like him. Looks like Terry Gillian should have directed this..
The Fault in our Stars - 7.8/10 - Not your typical cancer movie. Smartly written, drags on a bit at the end.
People that buy tickets to just make a profit on Stub Hub should be forced to answer a question about the artist or sporting event that they are attending. Or maybe it should be illegal to sell tickets for a certain percentage over retail? War on Drugs tickets retailed for $26.00. They are selling on Stub Hub for $152.32.
Met an old man last week that would win the award for the angriest looking old man of the year award.
Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, and many other celebrities has their phones hacked and had pictures put up online that were not meant to be online. I know that this is an injustice, and that this shouldn't happen. The old adage has to be spoken again though. If you are famous, and you don't want the masses to see particular photos of you, don't put them anywhere in the digital universe.
Back to school is today. Going through my Facebook feed I see a bunch of people that I know are going back to school. I couldn't even imagine.
There is only one profession that I can tell what somebody does for a living by just talking to them at work for five minutes. It's a teacher. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing. All I know is that you ask the most questions out of anybody on the face of the earth about a flash drive.
I wouldn't work for Skeletor. I don't think I could handle his voice for any particular amount of time.
Jim Jefferies is a funny guy. Watched his Netflix special recently. It kept me entertained, and it was quoted multiple times over the weekend. You did well my friend.
If Toronto gets another NHL team. How much would you pay to see the second Toronto team win the cup before the Leafs?
Were at a Bachelor party this past weekend in Niagara. We stopped at a winery where the groom to be was receiving some advice from old married men. If you were to Google every old man joke about marriage the top 5 were stated.
Sara is back in less then a week. I have never lived alone for any amount of time. It's going to be very strange to have somebody in the house again. It should prevent me from talking to myself. One thing I noticed is that I am a genius when there is nobody to debate me on anything.
There are things that are in my house that I can't believe were purchased. None more stupid then buying fur from Fabricland without knowing how to sew. I just thought I would sit down at a sewing machine and it would come to me to know how to sew a Teen Wolf costume.
Put a cork screw through a screw top wine bottle last week. Not once, but twice.
The Double - 7.5/10 - Jesse Eisenberg has a doppleganger that is nothing like him. Looks like Terry Gillian should have directed this..
The Fault in our Stars - 7.8/10 - Not your typical cancer movie. Smartly written, drags on a bit at the end.
People that buy tickets to just make a profit on Stub Hub should be forced to answer a question about the artist or sporting event that they are attending. Or maybe it should be illegal to sell tickets for a certain percentage over retail? War on Drugs tickets retailed for $26.00. They are selling on Stub Hub for $152.32.
Met an old man last week that would win the award for the angriest looking old man of the year award.
Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, and many other celebrities has their phones hacked and had pictures put up online that were not meant to be online. I know that this is an injustice, and that this shouldn't happen. The old adage has to be spoken again though. If you are famous, and you don't want the masses to see particular photos of you, don't put them anywhere in the digital universe.
Back to school is today. Going through my Facebook feed I see a bunch of people that I know are going back to school. I couldn't even imagine.
There is only one profession that I can tell what somebody does for a living by just talking to them at work for five minutes. It's a teacher. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing. All I know is that you ask the most questions out of anybody on the face of the earth about a flash drive.
I wouldn't work for Skeletor. I don't think I could handle his voice for any particular amount of time.
Jim Jefferies is a funny guy. Watched his Netflix special recently. It kept me entertained, and it was quoted multiple times over the weekend. You did well my friend.
If Toronto gets another NHL team. How much would you pay to see the second Toronto team win the cup before the Leafs?
Were at a Bachelor party this past weekend in Niagara. We stopped at a winery where the groom to be was receiving some advice from old married men. If you were to Google every old man joke about marriage the top 5 were stated.
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